The Wondrous Digital World
by Delusion Dreamer - Iota
Summary: In which a girl tries out that one popular MMORPG and things don't go as planned.
**Just an idea I came up with. I guess this is also a test to see if I can grasp a certain character's personality.**

 **I might continue if I feel like it.**

 **Blame Cyberdimension Neptunia for this! XD  
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 **[MIRAGE GEAR: START]**

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 **[WELCOME TO FOUR GODDESSES ONLINE 2]**

 **[MODE: MIRAGE GEAR]**

 **• [LOGIN]**

 **[CREATE A NEW ACCOUNT]**

 **[WEBSITE]**

 **[CREDITS]**

 ***In the case an error occurs, the game will automatically switch to Desktop Mode.**

 **©SEIGA, 2014-2016 - Licensed by SEIGA Enterprises, LTD.**

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 **Account: WhiteHammer889**

 **Password: ***********

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 **[Login** **Authorized!]**

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 **[There are no characters in this account. Your first one will be created now.]**

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 **[CHOOSE A NATION]**

 **[Planeptune]**

 **[Lastation]**

 **• [Lowee]**

 **[Leanbox]**

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 **[CHOOSE A NICKNAME:]**

 **Weiss**

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 **[NICKNAME ACCEPTED]**

 **[LOADING CHARACTER CREATOR]**

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 **Beginner Town - Starting Island (Ch.67)**

 **[19:54]**

The start of a new adventure is always exciting, isn't it?

Armed with only a simple dagger, with a whole new world in beautiful 128K graphics right in front of you, just begging to be explored...

Grassy plains, snowy forests, fiery mountains, each one covered by thousands of amazingly rendered monsters, from minuscule slimes to gigantic titans...

Innumerable dungeons for newbies and veterans alike, each one filled with amazing treasures which only the bravest and better equipped adventurers will ever obtain...

Hundreds of majestic castles, each one manually built wall piece by wall piece by each Guild, one of which might one day become your home...

A fantasy, and of the best kind. This is what this world is.

However, it wouldn't do for everyone to be thrown in such a world at random, no matter how beautiful it is. After all, there was the mention of monsters.

And so we have the appropriately named Beginner Town in the appropriately named Starting Island, where all newcomers appear before finally heading to their choosen nations.

Newcomers... such as **her**.

Blue eyes slowly open as soon as the loading screen disappears. Nothing but darkness adorned by stars and faraway clouds meet her sight, almost as if she's somehow standing in the sky.

The sounds of chatter and metal hitting metal greet her almost immediately as the sound settings finish loading. Before her eyes, the world builds itself from nothing.

First is the house in front of her, its gray stone bricks and straw roof screaming nothing but the word 'medieval'.

Then are the houses around it, each sporting a different size and shape while maintaining the same theme as the first one.

After that are the objects. Most are simple things like displaced pickaxes, brooms, pieces of food, dropped outfits and other trivialities. Some are stands and cartwheels filled with specialized equipments manned by players and NPCs alike, from simple vendors to crafters and enchanters.

Amusingly enough, only afterwards do the people actually using the objects appear.

And only after all is loaded does the gray ground appear, its design as medieval as everything else. Which is to say it's made of stone bricks.

A smile crosses the girl's face. That was surprisingly enjoyable, as if watching the birth of a world.

The smile disappears as soon as it came.

She can't let herself be seduced by a pretty sight. The only reason she's here is because of curiosity, not to lose herself in this fantasy.

Not that a mere grind-based MMO is enough to make her lose herself, of course. No matter how it's her first time in a Mirage Gear MMO, and how she's honestly a bit amazed right now.

This is still just a crappy online game with focus on grinding which caught her attention and just so happens to be mentioned by an annoying fr- _acquaintance_ of hers every ten seconds.

A crappy online game with focus on grinding which caught her attention _because_ an annoying acquaintance of hers mentions it every ten seconds, to be more exact.

She doesn't even _like_ this kind of game. She can count the number of MMOs she's ever played on one hand. In the end, playing always becomes tedious when you're all maxed out.

A game shouldn't be tedious. That's White Rule 1#. Games should be fun, fun for everyone.

Purple Rule 1# is probably something along the lines of 'grind, grind, grind'. That, or it's about going fast.

Whatever is the case, she never really saw herself trying 4GO2, but sometimes it's Saturday and you suddenly feel like doing something new.

And boy, does this feel new.

She's gotta hand it to the developers, this whole place looks far too realistic with the Mirage Gear. It's as if everything is real.

Then again, does it _feel_ real?

The wind certainly does, but that's far easier to program than artificial sensory nerves. The wind will always feel just about the same, save for its intensity, whereas the same obviously can't be said about touching things.

Curiously, Weiss raises a hand to her short brown hair and touches it. The Mirage Gear's Scanner let her get the exact same hairstyle she has on real life, so she's pretty much a splitting image of real her. That's a given.

What isn't a given was how real it feels and _damn, this is far too accurate-_

Weiss stops herself right there.

No. She's not being seduced by the Mirage Gear's outstanding capabilities. That's no good.

She's just here to take a look at the game and see what made that idiot acquaintance of hers so addicted. Nothing more, nothing less.

And speaking about taking a look...

The girl directs her view downwards, only to see a... simple raggy dress which wouldn't look out of place on a hobo and a holster with a dagger at her waist.

... Actually, now that she thinks about it, she _is_ a hobo in this game, isn't she?

The girl lets out a short sigh. Of course she didn't expect the game to let her keep the nice clothes from the Character Creator, but still, this is quite... underwhelming.

Well, at least she could get the name she wanted on her first try. From what she heard, there are people who spend hours on that prompt alone.

Seriously, how stupid.

But, as much as Weiss loves thinking about stupid things stupid people do, she better stop dilly-dallying and get started!

Alright, first is... buying a weapon?

Yeah, that sounds about right. It's simply logical. No way she's downing a dragon with her bare hands.

... Not in the game, at least.

She's probably been given a few Credits to start the game with. Time to put them in use.

A bit of waving her head around reveals a Weapons Stand just a few meters away, manned by some generic guy who might or might not be a NPC.

Well, that was easy. She's not complaining.

Weiss walks up to-

 ***DING***

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 **Welcome to Four Goddesses Online 2!**

 **Let's get started, shall we?**

 **First of all, you should head to the Class Counter in the local Guild House and pick your class!**

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"... Huh?"

The girl can't help but blink at the sudden window which popped up right in front of her. Without a word, she simply touches the 'Ok!' button near the bottom, closing the window.

Looks like buying a weapon is _not_ the first thing to do, huh?

Does that mean she didn't start with a few Credits, then?

Wait, there's that C down there in her field of view with a 0 next to it.

... Damn. No doubt about it, she's totally a hobo.

And to think she was really liking that white hammer decorated with sapphires right there...

 ***DING***

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 **Weapon Class: Hammer**

 **Class Which Favors It: Healer**

 **Hammers are mainly physical weapons which focus on slow and powerful attacks.**

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And once again Weiss blinks in confusion. Was that tutorial window triggered by her _line of sight_?

No, better yet.

That tutorial window was certainly helpful. However, it revealed something startling, to say the least.

Hammers... are for Healers?

Hammers...

For Healers...?

That's...

...

...

...

 **Healers.**

 **Use.**

 **Hammers**.

Who was the dumbass who decided that?!

Weiss can't help but tighten her fists at the majestic pile of bullshit presented before her.

What are they supposed to do?! Hit people until they can't feel pain anymore?!

Even if it's for defense, it doesn't mean crap if it's something slow as a hammer!

Healers are squishy, for the True Goddess' sake! That's how it works in real life! At least give them a fucking dagger!

But nooooo! Instead...

"Healers. Use. Hammers." Weiss slowly mutters to herself, as if attempting to grasp the strange notion.

 ***DING***

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 **Job Class: Healer**

 **Favored Weapons: Rod, Wand, Hammer, Mace**

 **Healers generally have high MP, INT and VIT and medium STR.**

 **Their skills are focused on healing allies and clearing status effects.**

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... VIT. They have VIT. And a bit of STR.

What.

WHAT!

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH-

Weiss takes a deep breath. She's not sure whether the real her actually does the same or if this is just some weird mental image, but she takes a deep breath nonetheless.

This is a game. Just a game. Besides, there's nothing wrong with a beefy tanky guy being a Healer in real life, is there?

If the developers want little girls who heal people to fight like beefy tanky Healer guys, that's their choice. Their goddamn bullshitty, probably drug-assisted choice, but still their choice.

It's not like non-berserking little girls would have any specific focus on enhancing their defensive and offensive capabilities, and the developers are probably under the illusion that most Healers are also proficient at reinforcement magic and the like...

But alright.

She'll just... forget about it.

All Weiss has to do is expunge the millions of reasons why that's bullshit from her mind.

And that's okay. She's completely fine with this turn of events.

It's not like she'll be a Heal-

 **GODDAMMIT, SHE USES HAMMERS!**

Weiss takes another deep breath.

A game. Just a freaking game. It doesn't matter if she'll be a goddamned Healer. This is just a game.

She won't lash out at digital -and probably unbreakable- objects because of something stupid like that. Hell, she shouldn't even be getting mad.

Yes. She's calm. She's the calmest goddamn person in the digital world right now.

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...

...

Yup. Not feeling like destroying the Universe anymore. Financier would be proud.

Now, where is that Guild House?

Her blue eyes scan the scenery, hoping to find a noticeably tall building which may or may not have 'Guild' written on it.

... Nothing.

A small tinge of annoyance crosses her mind. _Of course_ life wouldn't give her a break for a change.

But if Weiss were to give up because of something as trivial as that, she might as well crush her pride with her own hammer. All she has to do is walk around until she finds the Guild House. It's simple as that.

 _Or_ she could swallow her pride and ask someone for directions. Who knows?

The girl eyes the adventurers around her. Unsurprisingly, they look as realistic as everything else...

Or they would, at least, if some weren't standing around with a dead look like zombies or... dancing randomly. There's also that guy sitting atop a construct she's pretty sure is pointy and shooting her an unnerving stare.

... Pride wins by a landslide.

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 **Beginner Town - Guild House (Ch.67)**

 **[20:55]**

If this were real life, Weiss is sure she'd be dead tired by now.

No matter your stamina, running around an entire town at maximum speed for an hour usually does that. It's honestly a bit creepy sprinting madly and not feeling an ounce of tiredness afterwards.

But still, _she did it_.

Mission complete.

She got pissed off several times.

She almost rage-quit a lot of times.

... But _she did it,_ mostly thanks to the admittedly interesting sights quelling her rage and boredom as she ran around like a desperate athlete training for a marathon.

The occasional 'VIT +1' pop-ups also helped.

A minuscule smile graces Weiss' lips as her blue eyes examine the tall, castle-like building in front of her which somehow still manages to hide in the scenery like a chameleon despite its size. Thankfully, the big letters which read 'Guild' are a dead giveaway.

And so, Weiss-

 ***DING***

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 **[Guild - Beginner Town] Found!**

 **It has been marked in your map as 'Visited'!**

 **Fast-travel is now enabled. Be aware that it costs Credits.**

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-freezes.

Amidst this highly realistic fantasy surrounding her, the girl realizes she forgot something.

It was something obvious, and still far too easy to ignore.

Something which could have made the last sixty minutes become five at a simple glance.

Something... which is located right there on the upper right of her field of view, its symbol nothing but a stylized M.

"... There was a map." Weiss deadpans.

A map.

Of course there was map.

This is a fucking MMO, _of course_ there's a goddamned map.

And of course it suddenly pops up at the mention of 'Map'.

Niiiiice.

...

...

...

Can these game windows break, she wonders?

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 **A Few Minites of Raging Later**

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 **Beginner Town - Guild House (Ch.67)**

 **[21:02]**

Yes. Yes they can. That's pretty neat, actually.

But, anyway...

Blue eyes wander around the so-called 'Guild House' which, Weiss notes, doesn't look like a freaking Guild House at all.

There are a lot of counters manned by NPCs lined up and some boards on the walls displaying what are quite probably quests. So far so good, real life Guild buildings have those.

What they _don't_ have, though, is a joyous music blasting from nowhere and various wooden tables around the big room with a layout which brings the word 'bar' to mind almost immediately.

... And neither waiters and waitresses walking around with buffing drinks, for that matter. But they're an essential part of the scenery, she supposes. If you wanna make a Guild House a bar too, better go all the way.

Still, it's kinda off-putting. She's not really a fan of this kind of atmosphere.

Doing her best to ignore the zombie-people -AFKers, aren't they?- and the dead fish stares some adventurers who are probably in Desktop Mode send her, Weiss walks up to the counter in the middle, mildly surprised at the floating words which appear above it.

 **[Swordsman Guide]**

 **[Fleneria]**

That makes it quite obvious who's this heavily armored woman whose face she can't even see behind the counter.

Weiss honestly thought this game didn't have floating words for anything besides the player names. It's not as if she spotted anything besides that for the past hour. Turns out they're triggered by distance, huh?

That's nice. That way people don't get their screens cluttered too easily.

Weiss walks closer to the Fleneria woman, fully expecting a dialogue to trigger.

And, of course, it does trigger.

"My name is Fleneria, of the Royal Knights." The woman begins in a deep voice. "Are you perhaps interested in the way of the Sword?"

 **[Yes]**

 **[No]**

Weiss eyes the two options presented before her. Obviously, if she touches 'Yes' she'll be a swordswoman. However, she doesn't know anything about the class.

 ***DING***

Just in time.

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 **Job Class: Swordsman**

 **Favored Weapons: Sword, Broadsword, Lance**

 **Swordsmen boast high VIT and ATK while maintaining medium SPD.**

 **Their skills focus on heavily damaging a single target.**

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"... You gotta be kidding me."

Weiss shall not comment on how Swordsmen use lances.

You know what? She'll just be a Healer alright. She _could_ be something like a Mage or an Enchanter for the novelty, but healing already fits the 'that's new' bill while she still keeps her hammer.

With that in mind, Weiss walks towards the counter with a pinkette wearing a pretty dress colored white and pink.

Title or not, you can see she's a Healer from miles away.

 **[Healer Guide]**

 **[Minaria]**

Bingo.

The brunette doesn't even listen to whatever the NPC says, instead hitting the 'Yes' button as soon as it appears.

"Thank you for choosing our class! Really!" The Minaria girl says cheerfully as she bows.

And then...

...

...

...

... Nothing happens?

The NPC suddenly raises her head, a distressed expression on her face. "Ah, yes! I'm sorry, I almost forgot! You must complete the test first!"

Son of a-

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 **Outskirts of Beginner Town (Ch.39)**

 **[21:33]**

... Well, at least the scenery is nice.

That's the thought which crosses Weiss' mind as her blue eyes wander around the grassy plains filled with all kinds of dogoos and boxbirds.

Apparently she has to defeat 30 of each. Usually, that wouldn't be a problem. But right here, right now?

The brunette brings the small, rusty dagger up to her face level, examining the old and ultimately useless weapon.

This might prove troublesome.

How should she go about killing them...?

The girl sets her eyes on the nearest dogoo. Maybe she'll just go there and stab it to death.

... Yeah, sounds like a plan.

Weiss calmly walks up to the smiling dog-like slime.

Given its lack of reaction to her standing right in front of it, she guesses this is a passive monster.

Great, this might be easier than she thought.

 ***DING***

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 **PvE (Player vs Environment)**

 **When out in the wilderness, you will find monsters.**

 **Some will attempt to attack you on sight, while others won't be hostile unless provoked.**

 **If you find yourself in a fight, you must hit the enemy until its HP is gone.**

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Thank you, tutorial window. She wouldn't know how to win a fight if it wasn't for you.

Notice the sarcasm.

The girl punches the 'Ok' button without a second thought.

Her eyes once again descend towards the dogoo. Her mouth slowly twists into a small grin almost subconsciously.

It's farming time.

The brunette raises her dagger and HOLY SHIT IT'S ON HER FACE TAKEITOUTTAKEITOUT-

Weiss halts just a second before bringing up her dagger and stabbing herself in the face. The initial panic of having a slimy body suddenly attaching itself to her head fades.

She's not suffocating. This is just a game. And even if it wasn't, stabbing yourself in the face usually doesn't solve many problems.

Weiss would have stab strong enough to penetrate the monster's exterior, and weak enough not to reach her face.

Needless to say, that screams 'bad idea'.

Perhaps Weiss shouldn't try to apply real world logic to a game, but she's not taking any risks.

For now she should simply calm down and plan her next -and preferably not stabby- course of action.

There's a dogoo on her face. Which is strange, as they don't usually do this in the real world. Fortunately she can still see. The monster is opaque, so that doesn't make much sense, but whatever.

However, although her vision is fine, there's still a dogoo on her face, and she should probably take it out.

Weiss calmly holsters her dagger as the slime continues to try and absorb her head. Both her hands grasp its body and she pulls the thing with all her strength.

It doesn't budge.

Alright, this might be a problem.

Wait, that green bar near the edge of her view is slowly being chipped away.

... Alright, this might be a _big_ problem.

"Hey, nice headgear!" A muffled, unmistakably feminine voice calls out to her mockingly. "I swear you newbies must love it. I see people wearing those _everywhere_."

And it just got worse.

Annoyance crosses the brunette's currently dogooed face as she turns towards the speaker.

It's a taller woman, height about 1.6m to Weiss' 1.44m, walking towards her.

She's wearing a full set of green armor with eight wings exiting her back. On her head is an intricate helmet which, if you were to ask Weiss, would be described as an stylized golden bucket with abnormally dark eye holes and two wings attached to its bottom, which means they're pointing upwards as there's some idiot wearing said bucket.

As for her info...

 **[********]** **[Lv.**]**

 **[Rune Knight]**

... Freakin' private ID and level. Weiss didn't even know you could do that.

But, hidden level or not, there's no doubt about it. This is one of those cocky high-leveled casher players.

And in the tutorial area of all places...

Weiss curses her luck. As if things weren't bad enough, now she has to deal with some know-it-all jackass mocking her for having a goddamn slime eating her face.

... Wait.

"Glad you like it." Comes her calm response as a smile forms on her features, feet slowly moving towards a second dogoo. "Then why don't you TRY IT?!"

And a kick later, Ms. High-Leveled halts as a new stylish accessory finds its way to her helmet.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"... Nice headgear." The brunette comments after a while, wearing an almost unnoticeable smirk.

Cocky High-Level Jackass - 0

The Amazing Weiss - 1

She's not sure whether she'd actually kick a monster at somebody's face in real life. But here, in the complete absence of any danger?

That felt so _satisfying_ she almost wants to make an habit out of it.

"... Well!" The mysterious knight suddenly exclaims, resuming her walk. "Nice aim. I admit, I likely deserved that one."

Yes. Yes you did.

That's the only thought which crosses Weiss' mind as her mouth slowly returns to its default linear state.

"So..." The woman begins as she halts just a few feet in front of the girl. "Need any help?"

Asks the cocky player who seems to like belittling newbies.

As you might guess, Weiss doesn't have good first impression of her.

"No, _thank you_. I am perfectly fine alone."

She just knows partying with somebody like this woman will do nothing but chip away at her sanity meter.

The knight tilts her head, obviously not buying it. "Says the girl with a dogoo munching on her head."

"... Might I add how there's also one eating your fa-".

And then the woman punches the slime out of her face, the monster disintegrating almost instantly.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

Impossibly Annoying Knight-Person - 1

Weiss The Great - 1

"... That does not prove your point and you know it." Weiss calmly states.

"Are you sure~?" The knight mockingly asks her, much to her annoyance. "I believe I've just proven that I _can_ take that dogoo out of your face before you die. And I'll do it, if you just ask."

"And I believe I already said _no_." The brunette responds, perhaps a bit too strongly. "Besides, I still have time to figure out how to take it out by myself."

Somehow, even with all that armor on the woman still manages to look unsure. "Umm, your HP is at 20%. I'd guess the latching strike took a big chunk of it."

"Still. Have. Time." Weiss slowly repeats, daring the knight to challenge her notion.

"... Okay then." The woman concedes with a shrug, settling with folding her armored arms and staring at the brunette.

"..."

"..."

15%.

"..."

"..."

10%.

"..."

" _Alright_ , tell me." Weiss finally concedes begrudgingly, and somehow she _knows_ the woman is smiling.

Ungodly Infuriating Bucket Woman - 2

The Marvelous Weiss - 1

She's losing ground fast here.

"It's really simple!" The knight begins, raising her index finger for emphasis. "You stab at your face!"

... Say what, now?

Noticing Weiss' disbelieving stare, the woman simply chuckles. "I said _at_ your face. Don't actually stab. Just scare the thing, 4GO2 monsters have Fear meters."

No way that's the answer.

Even so, the brunette takes her dagger and, in a single motion, brings it to her face, stopping short of stabbing the dogoo and maybe herself.

... And it suddenly jumps out of her face and scurries away.

Goddammit.

Weiss' blue eyes raise to meet the knight's... black helmet sockets which should probably be showing her eyes instead of darkness.

It's obvious what the woman is waiting for.

"... _Thank you_." Weiss tells her as flatly as possible, making it clear she wished to say another word before the 'you'.

The bunch of armor which hides a woman inside somehow exudes happiness at those words. "No problem!"

... How come those two simple words annoy her so much?

"Now, you still have a quest to do, right? Why don't we party up and..." The knight trails off, as if realizing something important. "... Oh, goodness. On second thought, it's already quite late! It seems I wasted too much time with my Guild without even noticing. I'd love to stay around, but I should be going."

Great. _Amazing_ even.

... No, that wasn't sarcasm. As a matter of fact, it couldn't have been farther from it.

All she has to do now is send the bucket knight off.

The brunette sends the knight a curt wave. "Bye, then."

Nailed it.

"You see, I'd usually stay until much later, but I'm actually not in my house." The knight suddenly begins as she waves her hand and summons the menu. "I'm at a friend's. As a matter of fact, I found her playing 4GO2 and decided to join in! We're playing together at the moment."

And nobody asked you.

"We're also on the same bed~"

Aaaannnnd now she went straight towards TMI territory.

"Then you should go back to wherever she is." Weiss deadpans and, without waiting for an answer, turns around and starts walking away. "Once again, _bye_."

She already wasted too much time here. At this rate, she'll only clear the quest by tomorrow!

"Oh, and just one last thing!"

... Annoying to the end, this woman.

Weiss rolls her eyes as she halts and turns towards the kni-

Vert sends her a cheerful smile, waving at her with the same hand she's holding the helmet. "Good luck with the game, Blanny! PvP is perma-enabled on weekends~!"

And, with that, she punches the 'Log Out' button and disappears.

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

Blanc summons the menu and logs out.

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The moment her consciousness returns, Blanc rips the helmet off her head and bolts up.

Her eyes dart around the room, searching for any intruder for her to annihilate.

There's not a single soul.

But there's a warm silhouette right next to her on the bed, as if someone was recently lying there.

And that window wasn't open before.

...

...

...

Alright. That just happened.

Goddamn Trolling Pair of Annoying Giant Tits - 3

The Unbeatable CPU of Lowee - Beaten

And it wasn't even get close to a draw.

"Dammit, Thunder Tits..."

Blanc slowly falls back on her bed, eyes staring blankly at the ceiling.

That wasn't nice. She didn't have fun. She wasn't enjoying her time in there.

Screw the Mirage Gear's otherworldly capabilities.

Screw the impossibly realistic graphics.

Screw the outright limitless gameplay.

And, most of all, _screw Thunder Tits._

She's _so done_ with this crappy game.

 **She's _so done_ with Vert!**

And considering how both are pretty much synonyms from her perspective...

Yup. 4GO2 is dead and buried to Blanc.

And she's never touching that goddamned pile of crap again.

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

Well, maybe just a few more minutes...


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